The Batshit Insane Ways Germans Tell Time (And Why I Hate Them For It)

I haven’t blogged in a long time, but this deserves a share!
I really feel for my English friends :)!

Oh God, My Wife Is German.

crazy confusing clocks “What time is it? Time to give up.” — Photo Credit: Richie Diesterheft http://www.flickr.com/photos/puroticorico/ — Subject to CC Generic 2.0 license

As you probably know, I am an American expatriate living with my German wife in Hannover, Germany. I am enrolled in an A1-level intensive German language and integration course, and you know what we just started learning the other day? How to read clocks and communicate time. How do Germans tell time, you ask? I have no idea. Apparently, they use unbreakable cryptography while dropping fistfulls of acid.

Here’s the deal — in America, we typically use the 12-hour clock to relate time. (Americans who use the 24-hour clock are either, A: In the United States Military, or B: Trying to act tough because they have little wieners.) When speaking to one another, Americans discuss time in terms of 12-hour cycles, specifying a.m. and p.m. for Ante Meridian and…

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